He Says I Am Sorry I Am Not an Easy Person to Want

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"i don't know what living a balanced life feels like
when i am sad
i don't cry i pour
when i am happy
i don't smile i glow
when i am angry
i don't yell i burn
the good thing about feeling in extremes is
when i love i give them wings
but perhaps that isn't
such a good thing cause
they always tend to leave
and you should see me
when my heart is broken
i don't grieve
i shatter"
Rupi Kaur, Milk and Honey
"the hummingbirds tell me
you've changed your hair
i tell them i don't care
while listening to them
describe every detail

hunger - rupi kaur"
Rupi Kaur, The Sun and Her Flowers

"wish pure love and soft peace
upon the ones
who've been unkind to you
and keep moving forward
- this will free you both"
Rupi Kaur, The Sun and Her Flowers
"they leave
and act like it never happend
they come back
and act like they never left

- ghost"
Rupi Kaur, The Sun and Her Flowers

"i have this productivity anxiety
that everyone else is working harder than me
and i'm going to be left behind
cause i'm not working fast enough
long enough
and i'm wasting my time

i don't sit down to have breakfast
i take it to go
i call my mother when i'm free—otherwise
it takes too long to have a conversation

i put off everything that
won't bring me closer to my dreams
as if the things i'm putting off
are not the dream themselves

isn't the dream
that i have a mother to call
and a table to eat breakfast at

instead i'm lost in the sick need
to optimize every hour of my day
so i'm improving in some way
making money in some way
advancing my career in some way
because that's what it takes
to be successful
right

i excavate my life
package it up
sell it to the world
[...]

capitalism got inside my head
and made me think my only value
is how much i produce
for people to consume
capitalism got inside my head
and made me think
i am of worth
as long as i am working

i learned impatience from it
i learned self-doubt from it
learned to plant seeds in the ground
and expect flowers the next day

but magic
doesn't work like that
magic doesn't happen
cause i've figured out how to
pack more work in a day
magic moves
by the laws of nature
and nature has its own clock
magic happens
when we play
when we escape
daydream and imagine
that's where everything
with the power to fulfill us
is waiting on its knees for us

- productivity anxiety"
Rupi Kaur, Home Body

"I long
for you
but you long
for someone else
I deny the one
who wants me
cause I want someone else"
Rupi Kaur, The Sun and Her Flowers
"Your name is
the strongest
positive and negative
connotation in any language
it either lights me up or
leaves me aching for days"
Rupi Kaur, Milk and Honey
"it is a part of the human experience to feel pain do not be afraid open yourself to it -"
Rupi Kaur, Milk and Honey
"prehaps the saddest of all are those who living waiting for someone they're not sure exists"
Rupi Kaur, Milk and Honey
"you were not wrong for leaving
you were wrong for coming back
and thinking
you could have me
when it was convenient
and leave when it was not"
Rupi Kaur, Milk and Honey
"i am of the earth
and to the earth I shall return once more
life and death are old friends
and I am the conversation between them
i am their late-night chatter
their laughter and tears
what is there to be afraid of
if I am the gift they give to each other
this place never belonged to me anyway
i have always been theirs"
Rupi Kaur, The Sun and Her Flowers
"i am trusting the uncertainty
and believing i will
end up somewhere
right and good"
Rupi Kaur, Home Body
"Sometimes
I stop myself from
saying the words out loud
as if leaving my mouth too often
might wear them down

- I love you"
Rupi Kaur, The Sun and Her Flowers

"kiss me like i am the center point of gravity and you are falling into me like my soul is the focal point of yours."
Rupi Kaur, Milk and Honey
"my mind keeps running off to dark corners and coming back with reasons for why i am not enough"
Rupi Kaur, Home Body
"when I hit the rock bottom
that exist after the rock bottom
and no rope or band appeared
i wondered
what if nothing wants me
because I do not want me

- i am both the poison and the antidote"
Rupi Kaur, The Sun and Her Flowers

"The year is done. I spread the past three hundred sixty-five days before me on the living room carpet. Here is the month I decided to shed everything not deeply committed to my dreams. The day I refused to be a victim to the self-pity. Here is the week I slept in the garden. The spring I wrung the self-doubt by its neck. Hung your kindness up. Took down the calendar. The week I danced so hard my heart learned to float above water again. The summer I unscrewed all the mirrors from their walls. No longer needed to see myself to feel seen. Combed the weight out of my hair. I fold the good days up and place them in my back pocket for safekeeping. Draw the match. Cremate the unnecessary. The light of the fire warms my toes. I pour myself a glass of warm water to cleanse myself for january. Here I go. Stronger and wiser into the new."
Rupi Kaur, The Sun and Her Flowers
"representation
is vital
otherwise the butterfly
surrounded by a group of moths
unable to see itself
will keep trying to become the moth
- representation"
Rupi Kaur, The Sun and Her Flowers
"stay
i whispered
as you
shut the door behind you"
Rupi Kaur, Milk and Honey
"who tricked you into believing another person was meant to complete you when the most they can do is complement"
Rupi Kaur, Milk and Honey
"make it a point
to love yourself
as fiercely as you do other people

- commitment"
Rupi Kaur, Home Body

"i can't tell if my mother is
terrified or in love with
my father it all
looks the same

i flinch when you touch me
i fear it is him"
Rupi Kaur, Milk and Honey

"you lose everything
when you don't love yourself

- and gain everything when you do"
Rupi Kaur, Home Body

"he says
i am sorry i am not an easy person to want
i look at him surprised
who said i wanted easy
i don't crave easy
i crave goddamn difficult"
Rupi Kaur, Milk and Honey
"it's easy to love
the nice things about ourselves
but true self-love is
embracing the difficult parts
that live in all of us
- acceptance"
Rupi Kaur, Home Body
"i want to leave this place knowing
i did something with my body
other than trying to
make it look perfect"
Rupi Kaur, Home Body
"love is not cruel/ we are cruel/ love is not a game/ we have made a game/ out of love"
Rupi Kaur, Milk and Honey
"the way you speak of yourself
the way you degrade yourself
into smallness
is abuse
-self-harm"
Rupi Kaur, The Sun and Her Flowers

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Milk and Honey Milk and Honey
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The Sun and Her Flowers The Sun and Her Flowers
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Source: https://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/8075577.Rupi_Kaur?page=7

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